I blame the heat and nothing good in theaters but for the holdovers from previous weeks (go see Winter's Bone, I Am Love, Toy Story 3 and I Am Love if you haven't. Uh... I Am Love you're required to see twice, apparently -- Freudian typo!) for this week's Towleroad article. After assessing the Andrew Garfield as Spider-Man announcement I obsess over the Year in Screen Hotties (thus far).
Since Towleroad is all about the Gay the list is men but since I'm an actressexual and since all the best people are at least bi-curious when it comes to the movies, you know I can't ignore the silver screen sirens. I haven't seen all of these movie but here's an incomplete overview of the year thus far.
The Girlie Show
Jan: Portia Doubleday torments Michael Cera (both of him) in Youth in Revolt. Kristen Bell can't pick a man in When in Rome. Can't pick screenplays either. Niche hotness, GMILF Edition: Helen Mirren wants her man crowing like a cock in The Last Station.
Feb: Amanda Seyfried, Our Lady of Annually Increasing Beauty, stars in Dear John. The Wolfman follows Emily Blunt's scent no matter the consequence; Who wouldn't? Uma Thurman turns men, not just man parts, to stone as Medusa in Percy Jackson.
April: Erika Alexander is a boho honey in La Mission. Zoë Saldana holds a hot piece in The Losers. Niche hotness, Gothic division: Christina Ricci gets yet paler (c'est possible?!?) as a perpetually nude corpse in After.Life.May: Ari Graynor's tongue brings ecstasy, albeit in pill form, to Holy Rollers. Scarlett Johansson wears ringlets and leather for Iron Man 2 and may or may not have speaking lines though no one can recall. Naomie Harris handles the first part of sex & drugs & rock and roll with her usual style. Love the 'fro in that first scene. Niche hotness, The Alex Forrest "I'm Not Going to Be Ignored" New Generations Award to Naomi "seduce & destroy" Watts in Mother and Child.
June: Colin Farrell's little mermaid is full grown Polish beauty Alicja Bachleda in Ondine. Please note how many reviews of Winter's Bone describe Jennifer Lawrence's long tresses and full lips in as much loving detail as her performance, even though the movie is about as far from "sexy" as a movie can be. Marisa Tomei is still working the 'dream girl for losers' track in Cyrus. Can you blame the losers? Tilda Swinton is a prized pale gold Russian collectible in I Am Love. Cameron Diaz in primary colors, yellow bridesmaid, red bikini for Knight and Day. Gina Gershon is a whore! (not a dancer) in Love Ranch... the less said about the rest of the movie, the better.
Which actors and actresses grabbed your eyeballs this year?
It doesn't have to be for, uh, performance reasons.
*
No comments:
Post a Comment