50 Appropriate Ways to Celebrate Tilda Swinton.

The fabulous Tilda Swinton is now a half century old young timeless -- old, young... these concepts are too limited when it comes to the greats. But fact: On November 5th, 1960 Tilda Swinton first came into the world. So a tribute is most definitely in order.

50 Appropriate Ways 
to Celebrate Swintonian Greatness

• Be a genius.
• Dye your hair white blonde... or bright red.
• Be colorful.
• Imagine you have deep Scottish roots.
• Create an eccentric personal film festival.
• Attend any film festival near you.
• Have tremendous commitment to your art. 
• Exhibit tremendous loyalty to your friends.
• Watch a Derek Jarman film immediately. (This should have been first. Just pretend you did it first.)

• Stand naked in front of the mirror with your goodies tucked. 
• Say "Same person. No different at all. Just a different sex"
• That's right. Watch ORLANDO (1993) again. It's so good.
• Break the fourth wall with Jimmy Sommerville blasting behind you as soundtrack.
• Clone yourself.
• Enjoy your own company.

• Pretend your children (or niece & nephews) are twins. Call them "Xavier" and "Honor" all day. 
• Invite a friend over and do a crazy photoshoot. You photograph so well! 
• Pose for a talented painter.
• Become a muse for multiple creative types: fashion, film, art, music. Anything!
• Experiment with an open relationship.
• Wear attention-grabbing shoes.

• Be enigmatic. 
• Boss someone who looks like George Clooney around. 
• Befriend Justin Bond. 
• Sweat it out in a bathroom stall or nervously rehearse a speech. 
• Cause trouble for someone who looks like Leonardo DiCaprio. 
• Watch I AM LOVE for IT IS CINEMA...
• ...then have sex outdoors with an Italian or a chef (bonus points for both)
• Invite people over to watch you sleep... for a whole week.

• Do the Laurel & Hardy dance from Way Out West.
• Wear your most avante-garde article of clothing.
• Embrace Female Perversions... whatever that may mean to you.
• Listen to Orbital's "The Box"

• Get real drunk and run your mouth constantly ...maybe wear a creepy black mask while doing so?
• Take a swim and pretend you've crossed the English channel.
• Seduce someone who looks like Ewan McGregor.
• Pretend to hate your cat and him/her "Aslan".

• Offer a young bratty boy some Turkish delight.
• Wear a shapeless baggy black dress to an important event.
• Don't wear makeup just because people expect you to.
• Pretend you've just won an Oscar. (You don't have to pretend that you deserved it. You sure did.) 

• Learn another language. 
• Be cultured. 
• Join the 8½ Foundation.
• Complain to everyone who will listen that Tilda should have won a second Oscar for Julia last year. 
• Remember that art is more important than money. (Only sell out temporarily in short doses... even when the offers come flooding in.)
• Be androgynous.
• And/or appreciate the androgynous in others. 

• "Do not fade. Do not grow old."
• Never lack for imagination.
• Be your own person. There is only one you.

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"i will be your preacher teacher, any link you have in mind"

crazy people
Radar Online Mel Gibson's lost his marbles again. His angry angry marbles.
NatashaVC explains the ridiculousness that is Lindsay Lohan's absences from her alcohol classes
BlogStage speaking of crazy... albeit a more entertaining more benevolent kind. Lea Michele seems to think she could film Glee by day and take on the ghost of Barbra Streisand at night in Broadway's Funny Girl. This is, in a word, insane.
People Bruce Willis now has his own cologne. I love celebrities. They are so shameless. Smell like me!

linkage
My New Plaid Pants "Do it, Jake"... MNPP always makes me lol.
Self Styled Siren This is wonderful. The Siren interviews Mary Astor's daughter. A must for you classic movie fans. I'm glad that Siren opens with Meet Me in St. Louis because Astor is just wonderful in that picture (my review).
Cinematical Some enchanted evening, someone decided to remake South Pacific. With and edge. I'd love some original musicals but if we have to have remakes, so be it.
Art of the Title Sequence The Emmy nominees in this category. I do love the Nurse Jackie credits. Opening titles are one of my favorite parts of TV shows and this is why I knew I made the right decision to stop watching Weeds when I saw they had dumped the "little boxes" opening.
Flick Filosopher 8 extra minutes for Avatar rerelease. Do you care? I loved Avatar but if half of those 480 seconds don't fall under the category of explicit full braided neon sex scene with jakesully and Neytiri (hotness), I'm not forking over another $20!
Just Jared uh-oh. Colin Farrell is muscling in on Tom Cruise's Les Grossman-style makeup comedy
Writing the Wrong sequels that never were (for better and worse)

Being Boring watches lots of movies while sick. Derek Jarman this time. Do you do that too?
Towleroad A Betty White calendar? Betty White is our master now.
Asian Movie Pulse and Sina are covering a new film City Under Seige starring the beauteous Qi Shu and Aaron Kwok. Sounds like an interesting hybrid of sci-fi/horror... with circus performers. Wha?
EW If you've read my Julianne Moore interview, you know that I felt for Michael Ausellio yesterday when he spoke with Connie Britton. Now, he chats with celebrities all the time so it's no biggie for him but he's been pumping for Friday Night Lights Emmy recognition forever, so it's a sweet read after the lead acting nominations finally happened.

Housekeeping note
I've recently done a bit of sprucing up of the sidebar for your infotainment. For example, I can't believe I didn't have a "search" box before. My apologies. I know people are always asking "where's ______?" It's right below the advertisement in the sidebar.

Father Figure
Finally, hat tip to Anne Thompson, but the third Chris Nolan Batman film may start shooting next Spring. The "info" i.e. rumor is culled from this Michael Caine red carpet interview.



The interwebs will surely say claim this as breaking news but considering Michael Caine also states that he doesn't even know if his character is coming back, I'd take his 'I think they're starting next April' with a huge grainlake of salt. But I like what he says about his career

I'm a father figure now. I'm Goldmember's father. I'm Nicole Kidman's father. I'm everyone's father.

It took me a second to connect him with our Darling Nicki... that'd be from Bewitched (2005). Of all the movies to remember Michael? I mean, really. That's where you want to go?
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Tilda Swinton, Posterized

Art house patrons first saw Tilda Swinton in a series of controversial works from gay British auteur Derek Jarman's in the late 80s and early 90s (he died in 1994). A much larger international audience followed with Orlando (1993). In the past decade, key roles in mainstream Hollywood efforts won the great Swinton plentiful new devotees.

Do you remember the first time you saw her onscreen? My first time was Edward II in 1992 and though I was impressed, I had no idea what marvels awaited in Orlando the next year...

Tilda Swinton in Posters...

Caravaggio (86, debut) | The Last of England (88) | Edward II (91)

Orlando (92) | Female Perversions (96) | Conceiving Ada (97)

The Beach (00)| The Deep End (01) | Teknolust (02)

Young Adam (03) | The Chronicles of Narnia (05) | Stephanie Daley (06)

Michael Clayton (07) | Julia (08) | I Am Love (10)

That's not the complete filmography but the lead roles and a few key / essential supporting gigs. There are many more smaller roles. She's not at all afraid of a crowded ensemble film or a blink and you'll miss her cameo. The best of the latter is probably Love is the Devil. And even if you don't blink you might miss her in that rough trade art biopic (starring Derek Jacobi & Daniel Craig) because she's so shockingly unrecognizable in it.

How many of those 15 have you seen? Which are your favorites?

I AM LOVE is an absolute must see for Tilda fans and art film aficionados in general. The film opened in LA and NYC last weekend and adds more cities today. Did it hit your town yet?

previously on Posterized: Tom Hanks, Will Smith, Angelina Jolie, Viggo Mortensen, Cate Blanchett and Barbra Streisand.