6:49 Hi kids. Tonight is Tony night! The arrivals have been going on NY1 for approximately 45 minutes now but what do you now? Turns out my cable was all messed up so I spent the first 45 on the telephone with Monique trying to fix this damn thing. I was distracted by occasional glimpses of the stars. It's finally back on so I get the
GLEE team.
Matthew Morrison, Lea Michelle and Jonathan Groff. Basically here's what happened
- Matthew Morrison is going to try to make the PBS taping of South Pacific before it closes (he originated the often shirtless Joe Cable role in the revival) but he doesn't know for sure if he'll be able to do it. Translation: I am way too important now. Everyone must cater to my needs.
- Lea is busy. She's singing "Don't Rain on My Parade" tonight. Didn't she sing that on Glee? She has no return to Broadway planned. Too busy. Translation: Pay me lots for a short run.
- Jonathan is about to do the revival of Death Match (fun play -- Christopher Reeve played this role in the 80s movie version) and hopes he can bring it to Broadway, too. "If it's any good," he says. No translation required.... so points for honesty.
6:57 Michelle Williams -- not the great actress but the Destiny's Child -- is on screen right now. "Broadway is a new form of expression
for me."
Translation: "I'm famous enough for stunt casting. Yay!" She's playing Foxy Roxie Hart in
Chicago right now. That role is basically The Slut of All Time (
sorry Liz).
Everyone has played that role.
Chicago is currently the 6th longest running show of all time.
7:00 A few minutes ago the legendary Bernadette Peters was on the screen (left) and proclaimed that she has a Mutual Appreciation Society going with Elaine Stritch. Incredibly they are
both going to be taking over for Catherine Zeta-Jones and Angela Lansbury in
A Little Night Music.
Translation: It's going to be impossible to get tickets. They're both pure magic live. The legends are fully earned. Trust me. I've seen both live and would never trade those experiences.
7:18 Marian Seldes = Greatest Acceptance Speech of All Time. And it's not even being broadcast. I hate CBS and the way they treat the Tonys. She just won the lifetime achievement award. Made this expression...
...and then walked away from the podium.
Awesome, amazing, awezing.
Amazsome?Marian hasn't made that many movies but she's a stage legend. The last time I saw her on stage was in Edward Albee's
The Play About the Baby which is basically an abstracted version of his own
Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf.
While Marian awezed in that show, I would also like to say that David Burtka performed completely starkers. And then Neil Patrick Harris went and snatched him up in the real world. Well, maybe it didn't happen in that order but David Burtka
is a beauty, clothed or starkers, is my point and who wouldn't snatch him up? is my second point.
7:31 Memphis and
Red are winning lots of tech prizes. Maybe they'll take Musical and Play, tonight?
Fela just won Costume Design.
American Idiot won lighting design. They are just speeding through these awards. Strangely they are playing CAMELOT's ballad "If Ever I Would Leave You" to celebrate a win for Greenday's "American Idiot" musical. Is there a round table in that show? Or a virtuous knight who gets a lot of royal action?
7:40 Somebody just threw glitter on stage at the Tonys. As if the Tonys needed any encouragement!
7:43 I keep missing things. Live Blogging is
hard [/whine]
7:45 I'm always surprised when men thank their wives at the Tonys. I apologize for my reflexive homonormativity.
Now the show proper is being broadcast on CBS
8:02 Wow. They opened with a piano medley which broke into "Blue Suede Shoes" And Sean Hayes can
really play the piano. Who knew? Kristin Chenoweth joins him to sing "Say a Little Prayer" and then we get a little Sherie Rene Scott. If I were someone famous, people would say...
things ... about my love of blonde divas. I'm insatiable for them.
pint size greatness | regular sized greatness
It's like I'm Alfred Hitchcock only I don't want to visualize them as pretty corpses or terrorize them. Unless you count forcing them into a lifetime servitude of singing, dancing and acting for my entertainment as
terrorizing. And you shouldn't. I'm a good grateful fan. Love those two girls.... so... much.
8:10 Green Day is performing. When one of their songs isn't playing I always forget that I like them. I also L-O-V-E that song that Billie Joe Armstrong did with the Go-Gos "Unforgiven". If you don't know that Go-Gos song, you must download it now. It's a beaut. Shoulda been a massive hit.
8:13 Mandatory reaction shots from movie stars: Will Smith, Michael Douglas, Catherine Zeta Jones. We'll get a lot of those tonight.
8:16 Sean Hayes just tongued Kristin Chenoweth. Hee. Kristin is highlarious as usual although her voice was not in great form earlier. Never heard her voice that weak. Maybe Sean Hayes has cooties.
8:19 Brilliant point from The Boyfriend. Look at Sean Hayes... He could play John Edwards "And you know that's a TV Movie waiting to happen." Look at him. You'll see it.
8:20 Katie Holmes is presenting "Film goes by at 24 frames per second..." Like you know that, Katie! If not for the teleprompter...
<--- OhMyGod. Scarlett Johansson is now a Tony Winner (Best Featured Actress,
A View From the Bridge). She just called Ryan Reynolds "My Canadian who I live with" That's quite a weird new way to say "Husband."
8:32 Now that commercials are playing I am forced to consider that Scarlett Johansson may one day be a
Triple Crowner. She just needs a deglam movie in about 6 years for the Oscar. The Emmy is easiest.
8:36 ----> Eddie Redmayne just won Best Featured Actor (
Red). You've seen him getting randy with screen mommy Julianne Moore (
Savage Grace) and trying to kill Cate Blanchett (
The Golden Age) and now you just saw him win a Tony. And, as
In Contention points out, he'll probably be the lead in Steven Spielberg's
War Horse (2012). Could Oscar follow Tony?
8:40 Charming performance from
La Cage Aux Folles which I've heard is great. "Zaza" targeted Matthew Morrison and Will Smith in the audience. Really really funny bit with being unable to tear herself away from Matthew Morrison but of course Will Smith had to act horrified that "she" sat on his lap. I hate it when Will Smith reminds me about what an ass he was about the kiss in
Six Degrees of Separation (1993).
8:51 I totally can't keep up with this show. It's so speedy. Antonio Banderas was on a few minutes ago and he's SO going to have a major career revival: a Broadway starring role (
Zorba the Greek revival)
and a new Almodóvar role. Score times two.
8:53 They're talking about
Next Fall which I think must be closing any second. I really want to see it. That was cute banter. Maybe it'll sell a few more tickets?
8:56 The Lovely Laura Linney is promoting her play
Time Stands Still (
I went to an evening where she spoke of this, too) which is returning to Broadway in the fall. But do you think she's thinking about ScarJo right now? Like
'Damnit. She won a Tony before me?'8:57 That was generous. Jon Bon Jovi just did a live feed intro for
Memphis from a stadium concert.
9:00 Commercials. Breathe.
9:04 Angela Lansbury. If she wins tonight, I think that's a record.
---> 9:07 Nope. Katie Finneran wins the category Best Featured Actress in a Musical
Promises Promises. No record breaker for Lansbury just yet. I hear from everyone that Finneran is amazing. GREAT speech about focusing on what you love. This bit was so cute.
'Kristin Chenoweth lent me her eyelashes.' And she also informs that Angela Lansbury took her out to dinner. Classy.
9:10 Memphis performance "Never let anyone steal your rock n roll" Fun number but I feel like someone has stolen my showtunes tonight. Not that many yet.
9:20 Kristin Chenoweth and Sean Hayes, co-stars in
Promises Promises are practically co-hosts tonight. She's SO much better in this setting than she was on the BFCA awards. She's just hilarious collapsing when she hears she wasn't even nominated. I guffawed, dear readers. (That means I literally LOL'ed, youngsters). She may have lent Finneran her eyelashes but she keeps several spares. Obviously. These lashes are
extreme.
9: 24 Catherine Zeta-Jones singing
"Send in the Clowns". Just sublime. Nobody can write a song like Stephen Sondheim. I love that he gets these huge birthday extravaganzas every few years. People are scared of losing him. Me, too. It's going to be so so sad. But if Luise Rainer can keep on ticking past 100, so can some of these other showbiz troupers. Random! I know that was random... but Send in the Clowns can send you spinning into all sorts of heartrending places.
P.S. I love CZJ as a musical star. I wish she would star in movie musicals all the time.
9:43 Commercials. But first we had a little Tony sponsored tribute to the NYPD from Kerry Washington. I love Kerry quite a lot as you know. But loving actresses is way more fun if Hollywood plays along. They need to give me more Kerry to love.
9:53 Best Actor and Best Actress went to
Fences. That'd be Denzel Washington and Viola Davis (yay! Though I'm sad for Laura Linney who always loses both Oscars and Tonys despite being one of the most amazing actors on the planet).
I find it so odd that none of August Wilson's cycle plays have been made into movies. Don't you find that odd? Is there a playwright of similar stature that has never been translated?
Viola wins her second, Denzel wins his first
Viola gives a beautiful speech but part of me couldn't quite fall in love with it because when people talk about God in their acceptance speeches I always think "Does that mean God loves you more than the other nominees?" And in this case. Well... I'm pretty certain that God loves Laura Linney because, I mean, look at all the gifts he gave that woman! Anyway. I love Viola Davis, too. Denzel's speech was annoying. He didn't know the names. Denzel now has two Oscars and a Tony. But he's never going to be a triple crowner because he just doesn't do television. Not since
St. Elsewhere.
10:11 SERIOUSLY?
Promises Promises, a full on musical, just did a dance number with Sean Hayes sitting at a desk. Lame. This night is bereft of show tunes.
10:15 Sad Face. In Memoriam... the people the theater lost this year. The theater may lose me tonight if I don't get some show tunes. SAVE ME
GLEE PEOPLES.
10:18 It happened ages ago but it's already burned into my mind so it's only fair that it's burned into yours, too. Sean Hayes with padding and Sean Hayes as Lil Orphan Annie.
The sun will not come out tomorrow.
10:20 Cate Blanchett and her Need To Be Ubiquitous share the stage to present Best Revival and Best Play. I kid, I kid.
Fences wins Best Revival.
<--- EXCLUSIVE: CATE BLANCHETT TO PLAY TILDA SWINTON IN BIOPIC10:22-10:35 It just occurred to me that I asked a television show to save me from the lack of showtunes at the Tony Awards. Something is amiss. That said, thank God (who loves Viola Davis more than Laura Linney) for
Glee! Lea and Matthew perform actual showtunes. YAY.
P.S. I TOTALLY caught Will Smith enjoying Lea Michelle's Barbra Streisand number. Won't he worry that people will think he is... well... you know?
10:43 La Cage Aux Folles won Best Revival and now
American Idiot is performing. This show looks fun.
10:47 I am not a fan of Sean Hayes but I think he's doing a really good job tonight. Here's why I know: I keep giggling about things he did minutes before minutes later. It's a hosting job that keeps on giving. That Spider-Man singing "don't rain on my parade" bit was priceless -- especially when he was scared of the spider on his chest after taking the mask off. Ha!
Well, you probably had to be there. But funny it was.
10:57 Someone much less composed than CATHERINE ZETA-JONES has possessed the body of Catherine Zeta-Jones. That was as spastic a reaction as I've ever seen at an awards show and that includes Meryl Streep marathon hug run at the SAGs and Ally Sheedy's freakout at the Indie Spirits twelve years back. CZJ was crazed. She almost did a spinning heehaw jig after hiking up her dress. She'll be calling her agent tonight demanding an HBO telefilm so she can grab that triple crown.
I'm sad for people who aren't movie stars tonight. Especially my Sherie Rene Scott. So much star-f***ing tonight.
11:02 Memphis closes the night with a Best Musical win. God loved Memphis most. Now I depart for the comments section to try to catch up with y'all.
<-- Splendor in the grass. Spike directs Streep in Adaptation (2002)
Other Women For Context
