Tuesday, August 24, 2010

"You are such a buzz kill"


That's a Juliette Lewis moment from the Jennifer Aniston comedy The Switch. I'm glad that this scene in which she (apparently) gently chastises Jason Bateman for being insufficiently perky is on Apple. It's the closest I want to come to that movie, unless there's a scene in which Patrick Wilson actually performs his "donor" duty. What? I'm only human.

And speaking of... Patrick Wilson needs to be a bigger star. I suspect people have found him too bland for leading roles but that's a shame really because he's terrific in both Little Children (2006) and Angels in America (2003) and it's not like anyone was all that good in Watchmen (2009) or Phantom of the Opera (2004), so why hold those against him? Plus he was kinda great on Broadway in both The Full Monty and Oklahoma! ...not that they're making that many movie musicals and when they're making them they aren't casting for musical ability. [Editor's note: Dead horse. You are beaten!] It's just that he's totally great at playing these "generically idealized man" types and those characters are often in danger of being a touch bland... even or maybe especially if you're playing them well.

<-- Maybe Barry Munday (pictured with Judy Greer) will help since his looks are so downplayed and his body is so unchararcteristically that of a mere mortals?

Anyway...

I hate to be a buzzkill myself but I just can't get behind Jennifer Aniston as a movie star (though I would gladly watch her headline a sitcom). I always seem to want to recast movies with the lively supporting character actors switching places with the duller leading ladies and men. I would totally buy a ticket to see an artificial insemination comedy that was about Juliette Lewis's romantic foibles with Patrick Wilson wherein Jennifer Aniston throws some sort of party and dispenses supporting actress advice. Just like I might have actually bought a ticket to P.S. I Love You if Gina Gershon or Lisa Kudrow were communing with their dead husbands played not by Gerard Butler while Hilary Swank smiled from the sidelines doing best friend duty, always in danger of landing on the cutting room floor.

But if Hollywood made movies to please me they'd go bankrupt. Truth.

Here's the Weekend Box Office should you be curious about these things. (I know nobody comes here specifically for this -- why would you? -- but would you like seeing the chart referenced casually each week? Maybe you do look it up each week even if you don't really care. That's how I do.)
  1. The Expendables $16.9 (total $65) 2nd weekend
  2. Vampires Suck $12.2 (total $18.5) opening weekend
  3. Eat Pray Love $12.1 (total $47.2) 2nd weekend
  4. Lottery Ticket $10.6 opening weekend
  5. The Other Guys $10.1 (total $88.2)
  6. Piranha 3D $10.1 opening weekend
  7. The Switch $8.4 opening weekend
  8. Nanny McPhee Returns $8.4 opening weekend
  9. Inception $7.8 (total $262, #5 of the film year thus far behind some teen vampire thing) 6th weekend
  10. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World $5.2 (total $20.8) 2nd weekend
Did you contribute to any of these box office takes? Money well spent? Also if you've seen The Switch do speak up. I'm curious against my will. Some people I follow on Twitter had me convinced that Jen would soon win an Oscar (not for this but for something). That's totally plausible given what AMPAS voters value most in Best Actress (likeability, sex appeal, career heat. Acting is like 7th on the list.). But I'd have to retire. I just couldn't deal. The horror. The horror.
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